How to Ship a Tiger to Canada

I was discussing the matter of international wildlife shipping with a friend of mine, and she said, "Shipping is less complicated then you might think...then again, I'm biased, given that I do it all day long. The trick is to get the tiger into the box to begin with...after that you're all set. If you survive."

Now, my own current problems with UPS aside, I didn't think that it would be all that tricky. After a brief experiment, it appears as though I was right.

Step 1: Research 1

I gathered my reference materials

Step 2: Research 2

I learned all I could about tigers

Step 3: Research 3

I took extensive notes

Step 4: Hunt 1

I looked for tigers in the mythology section, as they have a powerful presence that causes stories to be told. No tigers found.

Step 5: Hunt 2

I looked for tigers in the children's section, for similar reasons. No tigers found.

Step 6: Hunt 3

I then remembered that tigers liked to eat, so I checked the fridge. I found many bottles, but no tigers.

Step 7: Hunt 4

Tigers like to play in water, but all I found was a towel that I had left behind.

Step 8: Hunt 5

I briefly checked the piano, before I remembered that tigers have stripes to help them blend in with their surroundings.

Step 9: Hunt 6

Ah, but tigers live in other parts of the world! I checked China...

Step 10: Hunt 7

I checked Siberia...

Step 11: Hunt 8

Then I found a Bengal tiger in India!

Step 12: Lure 1

I then distracted the tiger.

Step 13: Lure 2

And I started to lure him away.

Step 14: Lure 3

I brought him near the box.

Step 15: Lure 4

The hard part, as everyone knows, is getting him into the box. I switched lures.

Step 16: Lure 5

Once he took the bait, it was just a matter of sealing the box and cutting the string. This gives the tiger something to play with on his trip.

Step 17: Box and Ship

Then I just needed to address it and send it. The warning is obviously important.