Beer Can Cake

Wanna bake something but don't have a pan? Tired of those hippies scolding you for not recycling? Want an adorable way to serve your next (insert baked dessert here)? Or do you just want to stick it to the man? Don't fret, your friendly aluminum can is here to save the day!

Thanks to the magic of mass production, we now have liquids available in cans. Until now it was believed that these cans were only good for recycling and shooting off of fence posts, but finally Awesome Co. Inc. is here to offer you the opportunity to discover a state of the art method for cooking baked goods such as cake and loafs.

*Note* According to aluminum can manufacturers, there is a plastic lining in the can. This could pose a 'possible' heath risk by heating it above a certain temperature. I am not a doctor, nor a scientist, only a connoisseur of fine beer, food, and fun projects, so I cannot claim any such information to be safe nor dangerous. Enjoy at your own risk.

Things you'll need:

- Empty aluminum cans
- Cake or loaf mix
- A food-safe lubricant (oil, butter, grease, etc.)
- One hot oven
- Knife
- Scissors
- A serving plate, for you fancy folk

Step 1: Consume Before Baking

Find a can of your favourite brew and finish that bad boy off. I prefer tall cans as they can hold more and you look like a bad ass whilst consuming. Using a heavy duty can opener (I use Lagostina, she's a beauty, but the company no longer makes can openers - RIP) and cut the top of the can off. Make sure the edges are clear of shrapnel, we don't want any boo-boos. Once all your cans are open rinse them well and dry them off, since you will probably need to grease the can later.

If you're really crazy you can add the beer and/or soda to your cake. You're crazy, aren't you? I knew it.

Step 2: Mix It Up

At this point you'll want to start mixing your batter, or finding a sucker to do it for you. Cake is good, but rises a lot which means you'll need to leave more space in each can, which means you'll need more cans, and hey, it's one more reason to keep drinking. I find loafs (banana chocolate chip, please!) and denser breads sit nicely.

Preheat your oven, mix that cake up, grease your cans and pour your batter inside. I usually fill each can about half-way for loafs and a little less than half for cakes, anymore and you're cruising for a nasty overflow. Now would be a great time to insert something special into the cake, like a candy center, or a chocolate bar, or diamonds (for all of you billionaires out there...send me some).

Step 3:

Now pop those delicious tubes of hearty grain into your oven and watch the magic happen. Cook time will vary depending on what you're making, but they will cook faster than a standard loaf or cake pan since they are significantly smaller. Put a baking pan underneath for easy removal and in case any of them spill over. No one likes a dirty oven.

Step 4: The Unsheathing

So you spent the entire time in front of your oven smelling that deliciousness that lies within, now what? Slide that pan out of the oven and let them cool for a few minutes, but not too long, we still want them to be warm or the cans will shrink and make getting the cake out more difficult. If you were lucky there should be room for you to cut the top of the can off before the can curves; the middle of the can is the weakest and easiest to cut. First, go ahead and pierce a hole in your can in that area with a pin or a knife that you have neglected because it sucks. I use an old pair of scissors to cut the 'head' of the can off, then I cut a slit in the side and peel it away. If you greased it properly then it should come off easily, if not then you should go back to Home Ec. class and learn how to bake.

Step 5: A Dish Best Served Hot, and on a Plate, With a Napkin

Take that newborn cake of yours and slice er' up and dish it out. Congratulations, you just made beer can cake. Good for you, little buddy. Enjoy it, you earned it.